please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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