Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
