it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
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