i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
