I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
