Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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