Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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