I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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