It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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