She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize