I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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