Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Randomize
