I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize
