I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs sedatives and a leash
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize