loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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