I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
