The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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