...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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