so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
21 Guys Share Their Insane Stripper Stories
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
27 Reasons Why Men Need To Moan More During Sex
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.