so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
And then he peed in my hair
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
