Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
