I'm gonna have a badass scar
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize