in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
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