The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have feelings that need drinking.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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