you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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