You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
40s are totally the cure
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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