so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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