Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize