I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize