I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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