U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
