I like my sex mixed with concussions.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Actions speak louder than pants.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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