Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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