Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
