you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
