This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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