My first STD was from a foam party
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize