you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize