When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Randomize
