alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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