There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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