Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
