Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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