drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Just invented taco cereal.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.