Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize