I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
