and you said cock pushups were impossible
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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