People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I need to calm my uterus...
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize
