I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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