If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
